Yesterday at lunch I went out to my car and turned the key and wiggled the windshield wiper switch, because that sometimes gets them working again. My logic went as follows: maybe something got wet and messed with the connection or something.
But it didn't help. So I opened the hood and stood there in a mild rain shower looking inside. What looks electrical? I asked myself. There were various tubes and wires, something I identified as the battery. I saw the place where the oil goes in and where you put the fluid that then gets squirted onto the windshield and theoretically wiped back off if the wipers are functioning and gave a bitter, ironic little chuckle. I saw various other things. I saw a part with wires going in and out that my father-in-law the mechanic told me the Fiat mechanic had replaced. I gave that a wiggle and also the wires leading in and out of it to make sure they were plugged in well. Ultimately my hands were good and greasy from wiggling everything that would wiggle.
When I closed the hood and tried the wipers again, they worked and I went back into my office still ignorant of what the actual problem is, but somewhat happier.
I met an American woman once who had been to Indonesia and who told me they had what they call "black magic mechanics" there. Your car is locked into a darkened garage and you stand outside and hear tapping and stuff, which are the noises the spirits make who fix your car.
They do both mechanical and body work.
I mentioned this yesterday to an Indonesian friend. He filled me in on a few new details: the practice has its roots in the animist tradition in Indonesia, and it is primarily the mechanic himself who does the work (he thought). The mechanic can, for example, fix a dent by a laying-on of hands.
I told him I had fixed my windshield wipers that way earlier in the day.
It doesn't last, though, he said. Either the repaired part goes again eventually, or something worse happens. Sounds like the Fiat mechanic I take my car to uses one of those guys, I said.
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: Yesterday at lunch I went out to my car and turned the key and wiggled the windshield wiper switch, because that sometimes gets them working again. My logic went as follows: maybe something got wet and messed with the connection... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: j-a EMAIL: jeonga_kim@yahoo.co.uk IP: 202.71.195.230 URL: http://www.whatarewedoinghere.blogspot.com DATE: 09/01/2004 10:37:07 AMhilarious. i suppose at least it doesn't make matters much worse to tap at the car?
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Roberta S EMAIL: ms_Roberta2003@yahoo.ca IP: 209.162.160.44 URL: http://abbreviatedabstractions.blogspot.com DATE: 09/01/2004 18:09:08 PMInteresting reading. It explains a lot I didn't know. When a group of ladies including myself were travelling home after dark our headlights went out. The more mechanical-minded ladies cleaned the battery posts and jiggled the headlights to no avail. Feeling the felicity of the wine we had earlier, I took a run at the car and kicked the bumper. The headlights came on and remained on for the rest of the long trip home. Black-magic mechanics? Hmmm?
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/02/2004 07:22:12 AMA good slap on the hood sometimes fixed my headlight, too. I worked at a camera shop when I was in high school, and we used to fix cameras that way - if it didn't work, then we'd send them in for the repairs.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: flerdle EMAIL: flerdle@flerdle.net IP: 82.178.82.235 URL: DATE: 09/11/2004 21:47:52 PMSounds a bit like the bench treatment for spectacles - take them out the back and the bench fairies will adjust them while you have a cup of tea. Works wonders for those +special+ customers.
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Mmm. Autumn. STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/01/2004 12:10:52 PM ----- BODY:It feels like fall now when you go outside; the air is a little fresher, a little sadder. It was foggy when I drove through the woods to work this morning and I saw three deer bounding through a field towards the trees, looked like a doe with twins, but would they still be hanging out together this late in the year?
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: It feels like fall now when you go outside; the air is a little fresher, a little sadder. It was foggy when I drove through the woods to work this morning and I saw three deer bounding through a field... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: anne EMAIL: tuckova@gmail.com IP: 213.210.177.152 URL: DATE: 09/01/2004 12:44:18 PMmaybe the youngsters were just home for a visit. doubtless to do laundry.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: chris EMAIL: chris@nospam.com IP: 216.62.108.26 URL: http://www.javablack.com DATE: 09/01/2004 14:13:02 PMProbably Democrats. They seem to travel in support groups this time of year.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: francis s. EMAIL: francis.strand@gmail.com IP: 213.89.61.12 URL: http://www.francisstrand.blogspot.com DATE: 09/01/2004 19:52:27 PMI love fall. And here, the great thing about it is that you no longer have to moan and piss about whether the summer weather is going to be great or shitty. We're all past that by now, it's just too late.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: j-a EMAIL: jeonga_kim@yahoo.co.uk IP: 202.71.195.230 URL: http://www.whatarewedoinghere.blogspot.com DATE: 09/02/2004 05:22:29 AMi haven't seen autumn in two years. i can't remember what it looks like.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/02/2004 07:19:23 AMAbout five-feet-two, dark hair, crinkly eyes when it smiles.
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Hey, Bran... STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/01/2004 12:14:17 PM ----- BODY:...would you mind sending me an email when you have time? metamorphosist@gmail.com would be best, or anything you like at this domain. Thanks.
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ...would you mind sending me an email when you have time? metamorphosist@gmail.com would be best, or anything you like at this domain. Thanks.... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: anne EMAIL: tuckova@gmail.com IP: 213.210.177.152 URL: DATE: 09/01/2004 12:44:59 PMis bran a real person? or are you looking for something to help you stay regular?
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/01/2004 13:09:58 PMI'm assuming real.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: bran denburggate EMAIL: andy@zedzdead.net IP: 195.153.138.69 URL: http://www.zedzdead.net DATE: 09/01/2004 16:36:10 PMI don't send emails, but my office is always open these days
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Stop me if you've seen this already... STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/02/2004 08:49:12 AM ----- BODY: ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: Diebold security hole By entering a 2-digit code in a hidden location, a second set of votes is created. This set of votes can be changed, so that it no longer matches the correct votes. The voting system will then... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Brian EMAIL: bmkane@gmail.com IP: 24.131.146.216 URL: http://www.briankaneonline.com DATE: 09/02/2004 12:41:44 PMYup, seen it.
It's worth noting that this is not a bug, it was designed this way deliberately.
They're determined to steal this election at any cost.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: flerdle EMAIL: flerdle@flerdle.net IP: 82.178.82.235 URL: DATE: 09/11/2004 22:16:48 PMThis is just way too depressing.
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Guided meditation #2 STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/03/2004 09:44:19 AM ----- BODY:arg.. I second that.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: aldahlia EMAIL: girl@aldahlia.net IP: 24.5.145.172 URL: http://www.aldahlia.net DATE: 09/06/2004 00:04:16 AMare we supposed to think of the things that make us happy to take away from the regret of mailing off nude pictures??
:)
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/06/2004 07:51:34 AMThanks for the pics, aldahlia.
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Oh yeah, and STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/03/2004 09:55:42 AM ----- BODY:I was going to mention this, but the Aardvark beat me to it.
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: I was going to mention this, but the Aardvark beat me to it.... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: francis s. EMAIL: francis.strand@gmail.com IP: 193.15.61.253 URL: http://www.francisstrand.blogspto.com DATE: 09/03/2004 15:11:55 PMIt's amazing how he can just out and out lie, and nothing happens. Does the media really know so little about Austria? All these constant little lies from all these politicians add up to a huge moral vacuum; and we're totally ignoring the big, nasty lies, here, which are another story.
It positively boggles the mind.
I can't decide whether to cry, throw something or go somewhere and spit up.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jessica EMAIL: jessica@peacedividend.com IP: 66.117.128.123 URL: http://www.peacedividend.com DATE: 09/03/2004 17:50:22 PMThe Republicans lie about everything, and their constituents lap it up. But then these are folks who believe (seriously. like in every day life they refer to it) in the 6-day creation story from Genesis I.
This article (http://www.salon.com/news/feature/2004/09/02/cheney_convention/index_np.html) points out some of the other doozies from the Republican convention. Many of us here in CA wished Arnold had stayed longer, as it kept him out of our affairs. I imagine just as many watched his speech but missed the gaffs as they were too busy yelling "Terminator!" at their screens.
Yes, the media really knows so little about Austria. They don't even have a firm grasp on _American_ history. Several outlets misreported that Arnold claimed he became a Republican during a Nixon/Humphrey 1968 debate. If that's what they thought he said, they should have jumped on him for it: I don't think it's too much to ask that political reporters (or their editors) know that Nixon rather famously refused to debate Humphrey.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Big Time Patriot EMAIL: rant@bigtimepatriot.com IP: 24.19.23.173 URL: http://www.bigtimepatriot.com DATE: 09/03/2004 21:06:47 PMGreat piece, I had to link to it from my site as well... Might be helpful for those of us in the US who are weak on our Austria history.
But I do know that "Der Kommisar" was Austrian and not German, I'm not a complete idiot. :-)
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Big Time Patriot EMAIL: rant@bigtimepatriot.com IP: 24.19.23.173 URL: http://www.bigtimepatriot.com DATE: 09/06/2004 01:21:16 AMHere is a really surprising development "Bush's National Guard File Missing Records"
http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=514&e=5&u=/ap/20040905/ap_on_el_pr/bush_national_guard Wow, I am REALLY surprised by this, aren't you?
Hey, don't knock the European cars in front of the Americans. It just confirms their suspicions.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jessica EMAIL: jessica@peacedividend.com IP: 66.117.128.123 URL: http://www.peacedividend.com DATE: 09/08/2004 18:44:34 PMDon't forget Subaru.
I'm all for Mazdas, but with the freaky "raining toads" weather we saw, you might want a Subaru.
I was just standing there last night, minding my own business when my wife began doing situps in the hallway, coached by my oldest daughter.
My wife was topless, by the way. I can say that, right? We were all getting ready for bed and she remembered she still wanted to do situps, so she did some while my kid stood there and gave her pointers. We encourage exercise in our household so I did what any husband would do: ran into the office and grabbed the digital camera.
Unfortunately for me, my daughter is a competitive rower and amazingly strong and I did go through that phase when she was little, you know the phase, where dads teach their girls to throw a punch?
Anyway Beta went all bodyguard on me. I felt like a papparazzo trying to snap a shot of a Baldwin brother. Since I'm her dad, I guess, she only hit me in the shoulder, but man. Medium-sized fists of death. She pummeled me backwards, back into the office where I sat down.
"Knock it off for a second, kid."
"Delete those pictures."
"Will you quit hitting me."
"Delete those."
"Right away. Knock it off. Will you stop."
"Delete."
"Yeah, right away. I already said. Just let me check if any turned out first, okay?"
Got a couple good ones of the palm of her hand up in front of the lens, bodyguard style.
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: I was just standing there last night, minding my own business when my wife began doing situps in the hallway, coached by my oldest daughter. My wife was topless, by the way. I can say that, right? We were all... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: j-a EMAIL: jeonga_kim@yahoo.co.uk IP: 202.71.195.230 URL: http://www.whatarewedoinghere.blogspot.com DATE: 09/07/2004 10:20:01 AM(1) your wife was TOPLESS?
(2) your daughter didn't think it was weird that her mum was TOPLESS, but she did think it was weird that you wanted to take photos of her mum TOPLESS?
there is something really weird going on here.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/07/2004 10:41:50 AMThis is Europe, remember.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: chris EMAIL: chris@nospam.com IP: 216.62.108.26 URL: http://www.javablack.com DATE: 09/07/2004 11:15:57 AM"What's that one, gramma Beta?"
"That's me blocking your great-grandfather Mig's camera."
"Why were you doing that?"
"Because he was taking a picture of your great-grandmother when she was naked."
"Oh."
"Great gramma Alpha was naked?"
"Yep."
"...eeeew."
Everyone knows sit-ups are 50% more effective when done topless.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Brian EMAIL: bmkane@gmail.com IP: 24.131.146.216 URL: http://www.briankaneonline.com DATE: 09/07/2004 12:37:53 PMI am naked under my clothing RIGHT NOW!
(it makes my clothing 50% more fashionable)
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Michael M. EMAIL: ljubljana@beethoven.com IP: 213.161.3.30 URL: http://www.carniola.org DATE: 09/07/2004 14:58:10 PMI just want to say that I spent the past six-and-a-half hours searching Google for "amateur candid topless sit-up pictures" and after a long, horrific struggle wading through hundreds of false positives, finally made it to this page, where I was (again) bitterly, bitterly disappointed.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Karan EMAIL: karan@flummel.com IP: 24.18.52.52 URL: http://www.flummel.com/ee DATE: 09/07/2004 17:28:53 PMNevermind the boobies thing...
Your problem is that now Beta knows she can beat you into submission and so do you. Things will never NEVER be the same.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 195.170.73.164 URL: DATE: 09/07/2004 21:05:33 PMIt wasn't exactly *submission*. I was worried she'd damage the camera.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: k EMAIL: katherine_dubrall@yahoo.com IP: 24.220.233.175 URL: http://www.pagest.blogspot.com DATE: 09/08/2004 01:37:23 AMo god.
this made my day!
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/08/2004 10:15:41 AMURL??
(I couldn't get to the "off" switch.)
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jessica EMAIL: jessica@peacedividend.com IP: 66.117.128.123 URL: http://www.peacedividend.com DATE: 09/08/2004 18:43:25 PMTopless situps on hardwood floors? That's super hardcore.
My love of La Beta continues to grow exponentially.
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Gladiolas STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/08/2004 08:52:23 AM ----- BODY:So this field of gladiolas I pass on my way to work, you can see it, but are you seeing the field I mean? It's September now, so they're not as grand as they were earlier in the gladiola season. The ones that haven't fallen over yet are beginning to look more solitary in their rows, outnumbered by the weeds now.
It's a U-Pick flower field. In a dangerous maneuver, you leave the main road and drive over to the flowers on a dirt access road and park and take one of the steak knives that are in a plastic cup on the sign ("Gladiolas!") and wander around (if the field isn't muddy) and try to find some that are still presentable and replace the knife and briefly consider leaving without paying like other people you have seen, but you decide stealing flowers is about the limit, you can't go lower than that under normal circumstances so you pay and even let them keep the change, "them" being the heavy metal coin box welded to the pole that holds the sign and the steak knives. You do the math in your head, slip a bill through the slit and go about your business, shaking earwigs out of the flowers and delivering them to whomever, some young person, someone your own age, or some old person who's recovering from some operation in some hospital.
Traffic is heavy this morning since school has started and everyone is back at work. Not only back at work, even more of them are on the road this morning, driving their kids to school etc. Going past the McDonald's you let a dump truck merge because you used to drive truck and know how it is and he's just a working man doing his job, and because your dad used to do that too, and because you could use the automotive karma points right now.
Then, at the next intersection, the driver of that dumptruck lets another dumptruck merge, you know, professional courtesy, but luckily that second dumptruck quickly takes the next exit again so you're only stuck behind the original sorry bastard for the first three miles or so of your commute, but not even that matters because he's stuck behind someone else, a tractor, going even more slowly.
Then after that it's smooth sailing until you hit the traffic jam. Accident somewhere, freeway down to one lane, you take an alternate route but so do a lot of other people. So you call your wife and warn her and she changes her plans for the day. And you ogle pedestrians on the way to work and wonder what is with these pleated plaid quasi-schoolgirl miniskirts all the women are wearing? All the women, that is, but for the real schoolgirls, who are dressed normally? Pleated plaid quasi-schoolgirl miniskirts are a traffic hazard, they should be banned, or at least subjected to a hefty tax.
That would also make a tax collector's job more fun, probably.
There's no fog and no deer when you get back onto the freeway. Traffic remains heavy but it's great compared to the traffic in the town on the alternate route so you're happy. When you get to the office, you're a half hour late, but you're still the first one there, but for the hot receptionist, who is wearing a pleated plaid quasi-schoolgirl miniskirt.
That gladiola field. That's the one I mean.
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: So this field of gladiolas I pass on my way to work, you can see it, but are you seeing the field I mean? It's September now, so they're not as grand as they were earlier in the gladiola season.... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: D EMAIL: dave@acerbia.com IP: 160.79.240.162 URL: http://www.acerbia.com DATE: 09/08/2004 09:52:03 AMThat wasn't the Gladiola field I was thinking of.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Horst EMAIL: hprill@excite.com IP: 131.130.198.80 URL: http://www.aardvark.at/blog/ DATE: 09/08/2004 10:09:58 AMI think I cycled past that gladiola field last Sunday. Really. I'd never been in the area before, so it's kind of odd you should mention it today. And yes, I can see it, including the slightly wilted gladiolas and the sign asking customers to please pay honestly.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jessica EMAIL: jessica@peacedividend.com IP: 66.117.128.123 URL: http://www.peacedividend.com DATE: 09/08/2004 18:40:48 PMI want to cycle past that gladiola field.
I even have a pleated plaid skirt to do it in. It's long enough to cover my ass, though, and I put grommets up the side for lacing so it doesn't count. Skirts out here should come with matching panties - the regulation length is like 4" - but mostly they just come with waxing gift certificates. Which no one uses.
The horror.
"Let's say your mother died this summer..."
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: "Let's say your mother died this summer..."... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: D EMAIL: dave@acerbia.com IP: 160.79.240.162 URL: http://www.acerbia.com DATE: 09/08/2004 10:05:55 AMI cannot believe you're still using that byline for your title graphic. I look at that and shake my head in disbelief. Why aren't you on IM anymore?
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/08/2004 10:18:54 AMToo many people were contacting me, asking where to send their naked pictures of themselves.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jessica EMAIL: jessica@peacedividend.com IP: 66.117.128.123 URL: http://www.peacedividend.com DATE: 09/08/2004 18:35:32 PMGod knows we've all seen enough naked photos of D to know better, by now, than to use our old AIM handles.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: D EMAIL: dave@acerbia.com IP: 160.79.240.162 URL: http://www.acerbia.com DATE: 09/09/2004 14:34:08 PMIt was just that *one* time. And I have pictures of your tattooed boobs Jess, don't you forget.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/09/2004 16:05:56 PMCome on, I link a touching post and get a discussion of tattooed boobs?
(BTW, thanks for the pics D.)
You know about these already, right?
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: You know about these already, right?... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Do you speak Manglish? STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/08/2004 15:31:17 PM ----- BODY: ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: Your score was 13 out of a possible 15 Pat yourself on the back. What a flawless performance. You are the ideal partner. You can read the opposite sex like a book. You know that when a man says 'I... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: paul EMAIL: rant@industrialfreedom.net IP: 24.19.23.173 URL: DATE: 09/08/2004 19:33:09 PMI only got 10, but I think I got mixed up in the layers of "well she would know I said this because I think she wants to hear it, so I really should say this other because that would be more plausible to her, although it's no more true for me than the more implausible line".
I'm probably too deep a person for a magazine quiz. (which translates as, I can't be bothered to figure out what women want, and I'm already married so why bother?).
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: francis s. EMAIL: francis.strand@gmail.com IP: 213.89.61.12 URL: http://www.francisstrand.blogspot.com DATE: 09/08/2004 22:20:25 PMWait, I got 12 out of 15 and I'm a great big homo. Does this mean I've been repressing my heterosexuality all these years?
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: D EMAIL: dave@acerbia.com IP: 160.79.240.162 URL: http://www.acerbia.com DATE: 09/09/2004 14:23:55 PMI'm leaving a comment here before going to do the test to say that I always knew you were the perfect partner.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: D EMAIL: dave@acerbia.com IP: 160.79.240.162 URL: http://www.acerbia.com DATE: 09/09/2004 14:28:02 PMNow, having taken the test and seen what drivel the questions were... oh and being a bitter and twisted recently dumped man, I am not at all surprised that I scored 3.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/09/2004 16:03:39 PMI'm just hoping Alpha reads this post.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Drakona EMAIL: svesk@hotmail.com IP: 130.241.42.152 URL: DATE: 09/10/2004 08:06:25 AMHaving scored 8, I somehow get an eerie feeling that this could explain a thing or two about the constant state of confusion I'm experiencing...
I sort of hope I got real life confused with previous knowledge of this kind of test, and what they usually want you to choose... (kinda in line with my suspicions towards IQ tests and testing in general - it's mostly about knowing how to take a test, not about really knowing/understanding stuff)
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jim EMAIL: elzorroviejo@earthlink.net IP: 67.101.133.111 URL: http://home.earthlink.net/~elzorroviejo/blogger.html DATE: 09/13/2004 18:54:44 PMHah! I got a 13 also. I have to say that it is part being good at figuring out what the agenda of the test is, but it is also partly having been married for 25 years. Having faced most of those questions/situations more than once, I have learned through a process of eliminating my wrong interpretation what most of those actually mean. I'm sure the same is true of you. (Besides, you have three females in your household. You have to be able to correctly interpret what the female means if only for self-preservation! *grin*
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Autumn in Austria STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/10/2004 08:07:23 AM ----- BODY:On the plus side, my wife puts out hedgehog food and sits on the steps at night with a glass of nice red and observes the little guys' behavior and interactions as they come to dine. It calms her and makes her happy. It's like being married to Jane Goodall without having to deal with monkeys.
Also on the plus side is there are fewer mosquitos.
On the minus side is the mosquitos that remain are
Normally, the time I spend in the bathroom in the mornings is when I get the peace that sustains me throughout the rest of my day. Today these two little guys just wouldn't leave me alone. I went after them with a rolled up Japan Times for a while, but finally gave up. They'd fly up to the light in the ceiling, which would dazzle me, and then they'd fly somewhere else and I wouldn't see where etc etc.
When I was shaving, I'd had enough and went after them again, and overlooked a cabinet and thought I'd broken my hand. I finished shaving, holding the Bic disposable razor between my thumb and the only finger that wasn't temporarily paralyzed and fled the room.
Then I drove Beta to school. I had a nice summer, but I sure missed those drives.
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: On the plus side, my wife puts out hedgehog food and sits on the steps at night with a glass of nice red and observes the little guys' behavior and interactions as they come to dine. It calms her and... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: joeri EMAIL: joeri.cornille@pandora.be IP: 193.244.32.12 URL: http://www.urendagennachten.be/blogger.html DATE: 09/10/2004 12:46:32 PM"It's like being married to Jane Goodall without having to deal with monkeys." *mwahahaha*
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: D EMAIL: dave@acerbia.com IP: 81.157.11.29 URL: http://www.acerbia.com DATE: 09/12/2004 00:03:17 AMI thought they were robots anyway. Ooo! How about robot monkeys! Dude, that would be so cool... you could like, pre-program them to see no evil, hear no evil and smite no evil.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Paul EMAIL: rant@industrialfreedom.net IP: 24.19.23.173 URL: DATE: 09/12/2004 00:04:00 AMSpeaking of Beta, my wife and I were just recalling a visit she made to America when very young. She got one of her first McDonald Happy Meal's and it had a miniature Barbie doll in it. She was very happy and said in cute accented English, "This IS a happy meal!!" It was just precious, really, just as cute as can be.
Perhaps you can embarrass her with this story next time you are driving Beta and some boy she likes...
jocelyn and i have our sunday night drives [which are actually bittersweet for me because i'm driving her back to her daddy's]. we always stop at the drug store to buy girlie things, drive thru somewhere for dinner and talk and laugh and listen to our newest downloads from the russian mp3 sites :) some nights we don't laugh though. some nights we get all serious and introspective and weep and lash out at the people who hurt us... and then i try and comfort. without smothering. sigh.
sunday nights are the best nights in the world.
i HATE mosquitos. you are my hero for being injured in combat.
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Kiss STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/11/2004 20:21:47 PM ----- BODY:Alpha and I celebrate the 24th anniversary of our first kiss today.
----- EXTENDED BODY:I'm not saying exactly how, though.
----- EXCERPT: Alpha and I celebrate the 24th anniversary of our first kiss today.... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: bran EMAIL: persephoneNOSPAM@mizdos.com IP: 66.218.6.66 URL: http://em.mizdos.com/ DATE: 09/11/2004 20:23:30 PMwhat a great anniversary to celebrate!
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: flerdle EMAIL: flerdle@flerdle.net IP: 82.178.82.235 URL: DATE: 09/11/2004 21:39:00 PMThat's a really lovely idea. All the best.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: deb EMAIL: sugarfused@gmail.com IP: 24.158.178.235 URL: http://www.sugarfused.com/ DATE: 09/11/2004 22:07:01 PMAwww...that is a lovely thing to celebrate!
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: peggy EMAIL: moveable@moveablebeast.com IP: 204.116.177.196 URL: http://www.moveablebeast.com DATE: 09/11/2004 23:15:38 PMmmm...tingly!
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: D EMAIL: dave@acerbia.com IP: 81.157.11.29 URL: http://www.acerbia.com DATE: 09/12/2004 00:01:46 AMDoes she do sit-ups naked for you?
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: tuckova EMAIL: tuckova@gmail.com IP: 213.210.177.152 URL: DATE: 09/12/2004 19:49:45 PMnot saying how you celebrate or how you kissed?
that's sweet, though, mig. congratulations on still kissing the same person after 24 years-- you both must be very, very good at it by now. like "shibumi"-level expertise, but nice. ooh, shiver.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: j-a EMAIL: jeonga_kim@yahoo.co.uk IP: 202.71.195.230 URL: http://www.whatarewedoinghere.blogspot.com DATE: 09/13/2004 11:11:40 AMcongratulations indeed! how nice.
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Weekend, condensed STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/13/2004 08:10:33 AM ----- BODY:Mig: Arrgh.
Beta: EMOL
Alpha: Your back again, honey?
Mig: Maybe if you massage it, the spasms will stop.
Gamma: Thanks for getting me the princess veil at the medieval festival.
Mig: You're our little princess. Arrgh!!!
Beta: XNOR.
Alpha: Remember what happened last time. It just got worse.
Mig: It couldn't get any worse.
Beta: FLOYMZ.
Gamma: I don't know who I want to marry yet, but he will be big, and handsome, and nice, and have time for me and our children.
Gamma: [Dramatic pause] Just like daddy.
Mig: Aww.
Mig: Arrgh!! Jesus!!! Oh!!! OH, FOR F*CK!!!!! Arrgh!!!!
Alpha: I warned you. Now you're paralyzed with muscle spasms and I feel guilty because I'm Catholic.
Beta: MOZ.
Beta: Okay, finished.
Alpha: More alphabet soup, Beta?
Beta: Yes, please.
[The next day, Monday]
Gamma: Lucky today is a holiday for you, dad.
Mig: Yep.
Gamma: I never knew a grownup who had to be helped getting dressed before.
Mig: Eh, well. I remember tieing my dad's shoes when I was your age.
Gamma: Hahahaha. I can tie shoes, no problem.
Mig: We'll go with the flipflops, that eliminates the sock problem.
The thing about blogs, see, is that people read them sequentially.
11 09 04: "Alpha and I celebrate the 24th anniversary of our first kiss today."
13 09 04: "Mig: Arrgh. Alpha: Your back again, honey?"
And they start to write their own entries to cover the elisions.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 195.170.73.153 URL: DATE: 09/13/2004 09:36:13 AMit occurs to me that i'll be ready for this:
http://www.talklikeapirate.com/
and this:
http://www.thomasscott.net/yarr/
i love this! beta's alphabet soup!!!
hope your back is better.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: novala EMAIL: sodazitron@gmx.net IP: 80.108.27.99 URL: http://sodazitron.blogger.de DATE: 09/13/2004 11:44:58 AMImagine she had eaten number soup. (which you don't get in Austria)
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jessica EMAIL: jessica@peacedividend.com IP: 66.117.128.123 URL: http://www.peacedividend.com DATE: 09/13/2004 17:25:59 PMCongratulations on the kiss, and on the afterkiss.
Woet!
(my love for Beta continues to grow unabated)
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/14/2004 07:05:24 AMas does mine.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: D EMAIL: dave@acerbia.com IP: 160.79.240.162 URL: http://www.acerbia.com DATE: 09/14/2004 14:23:05 PMThe soup, what a great detail to add in. I tried mouthing the words to see if there was some sort of super-genius daughter hidden code or something first, then read on...
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Never read that little piece of paper in the package your medicine comes in STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/14/2004 10:45:39 AM ----- BODY:When I was a boy, I thought "Playboy photographer" would be the perfect job.
More recently, I thought, "guy who builds fun habitats for animals."
Now I'm thinking "test subject for side-effect studies," because I'm experiencing just about everything listed on that sheet of warnings that came with my painkillers.
Disorientation? Crankiness? Hornets flying out my ass? Check.
Flatulence? Sorry.
What would your ideal job be?
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: When I was a boy, I thought "Playboy photographer" would be the perfect job. More recently, I thought, "guy who builds fun habitats for animals." Now I'm thinking "test subject for side-effect studies," because I'm experiencing just about everything listed... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: D EMAIL: dave@acerbia.com IP: 160.79.240.162 URL: http://www.acerbia.com DATE: 09/14/2004 14:21:15 PMWriting up lists of side-effects for hypochondriatic old cranks to endure.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: novala EMAIL: sodazitron@gmx.net IP: 80.108.27.99 URL: http://sodazitron.blogger.de DATE: 09/14/2004 18:28:38 PMSpring - I'ld like work as Spring.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Karan EMAIL: karan@flummel.com IP: 24.18.52.52 URL: http://www.flummel.com/ee DATE: 09/14/2004 18:53:22 PMI'm doing it right now....but if Novala gets to be Spring, then I want to be Autumn.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: cj EMAIL: cjcbanane@aol.com IP: 64.12.116.76 URL: http://journals.aol.com/cjcbanane/Test/ DATE: 09/15/2004 03:58:39 AMSupreme Empress of the Universe, or
Venture Capitalist, or
Food Critic, or
Truck Driver and Auto Mechanic and Sniper and Hairdresser and Tarot card reader all at the same company with full benefits for 20 hours/week or
Cytopathologist
doing nothing.
having a job sucks.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/15/2004 07:55:16 AMD: I was thinking the same thing. But I could have listed the side effects *before* reading that list.
Novala: I'd say you're doing a pretty good job.
Karan: what do you do?
cj: you posted a picture of a spleen on your blog once, didn't you? that was cool.
j-a: i heard a story yesterday about a kid, about 23, who lives in a large apartment in the center of Vienna adjacent to his parents and does nothing, just lives off them and grows his dreadlocks and throws large parties and drinks their vintage wine when they leave town, and is lonely. doing nothing would require a special mindset, i think, but i also believe that we do far too little nothing in general. doing nothing is underrated.
Poet laureate of Tuvalu. I would write a poem about everyone, one poem for each of the 11 thousand and something citizens. It would take me the rest of my life. And by then, all of Tuvalu, all of the people, all of my poems and I would sink under the rising sea.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: ratty EMAIL: ratty@surreally.net IP: 4.26.76.16 URL: http://ratty.surreally.net DATE: 09/15/2004 10:39:52 AMhrmmm. you said flatulence and D showed up. how odd is that?
my perfect job? in 5 days. 8 miles both ways ... as opposed to 90 miles both ways. and learning new stuff. always good.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: francis s. EMAIL: francis.strand@gmail.com IP: 213.89.61.12 URL: http://www.francisstrand.blogspot.com DATE: 09/15/2004 17:32:47 PMRetired novelist. The actual writing is hell, but I'd love to have written three great novels, and maybe, um, four mediocre ones.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jessica EMAIL: jessica@peacedividend.com IP: 66.117.128.123 URL: http://www.peacedividend.com/ DATE: 09/15/2004 19:36:11 PMFrancis hit it right on the nose. Also whatever you'd call someone who rehashes earlier academic manuscripts for publication in the wake of the popularity of said novels.
I bet being a Nude Poetry Model would be fun, too.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Matt C. EMAIL: expresso2222@gmail.com IP: 69.11.139.69 URL: http://dailyseventeen.blogspot.com DATE: 09/15/2004 19:36:48 PMIron Chef Vegan.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: maesie EMAIL: maekile@hotmail.com IP: 38.115.0.253 URL: http://decayunderway.com DATE: 09/15/2004 20:30:19 PMPainkillers make me terribly depressed and give me crying spells.
I would like to be a self-sustaining homesteader or organic farmer. And maybe write books about it.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: peggy EMAIL: moveable@moveablebeast.com IP: 204.116.177.196 URL: http://www.moveablebeast.com DATE: 09/16/2004 00:31:52 AMCowgirl. But I have no cows.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: cj EMAIL: cjcbanane@aol.com IP: 205.188.116.74 URL: http://journals.aol.com/cjcbanane/Test/ DATE: 09/16/2004 02:24:27 AMNew job... lots of specimens... I'll officially post some absolutely disgusting stuff soon.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: anne EMAIL: tuckova@gmail.com IP: 213.210.177.152 URL: http://www.tuckova.com DATE: 09/16/2004 07:17:35 AMi like my job but i would be happier if i got paid a bit more. i would like to work less hours but there's that whole "need to eat" business. i was thinking it would be cool to be a professional blog reader but that might take some of the fun out of it.
i feel like i've written to you about this before: wouldn't it be interesting to think of "noth" as a verb? then "what are you doing?" --"nothing". and "who's that guy with the dreadlocks who lives in vienna?" --"ah, he's just a nother."
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/16/2004 07:21:36 AMThat's great. How did we live without that word?
'nother'... ha ha ha...
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: So these two deer walk into the rain STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/15/2004 07:48:00 AM ----- BODY:The sky couldn't decide what it wanted to do this morning. It started out raining at my house, but by the time I got my umbrella packed into the car it had stopped. Then it restarted and rained off and on as I drove to work. The clouds were low and not really serious about raining though and by the outskirts of Vienna it was like, fog or rain? Mist or what? The windshield wipers worked most of the way. When they stopped, all I had to do was wiggle the wiper lever and they'd restart every time.
It was good deer weather and I saw two in a field by the road.
My thoughts on the way in revolved around two or three ideas that I forget now. One thought I remember was looking forward to a pain pill. I don't take them until I get to work since I consider the Dobló heavy machinery. Another thought that comes back to me now was, I wonder how hard it would be to get people to pose for nude poetry, or nude short stories. Why should painters have all the fun?
Actually, way more than two or three thoughts now that I think of it. Now and then a careful part of my brain would remind me that the roads this morning were genuinely wet for the first time in days and therefore slippery and to therefore maintain a little more distance to the car in front of me. Another was about how life brings people, or lessons, our way when we need them, if we have our eyes open for it, sometimes. Like, I'm reading the Sufi literature at the moment, but I'm broke, so I meet a woman who lends me books from her collection.
And that thought led to some general thoughts about what do I exactly think about the Sufis, which is not a lot at the moment as my knowledge of them is minimal now, besides that Coleman Barks' translations or re-doings of Rumi's poems are something. I don't think about them so much right now as feel them, which I suppose is leaving out half of it, who knows?
And that segued into the question of whether feeling can replace thought, and how important are categories and Gamma's recent request to her mother to explain to her the word "category".
And a bunch of other stuff.
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: The sky couldn't decide what it wanted to do this morning. It started out raining at my house, but by the time I got my umbrella packed into the car it had stopped. Then it restarted and rained off and... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: chris EMAIL: chris@nospam.com IP: 216.62.108.26 URL: http://www.javablack.com DATE: 09/16/2004 05:51:02 AMPain pills make me think of weird stuff too, then forget it, then sometimes remember it again. I think.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: anne EMAIL: tuckova@gmail.com IP: 213.210.177.152 URL: http://www.tuckova.com DATE: 09/16/2004 07:19:56 AMhow did alpha explain "category"? was gamma comparing explanations or just asking one person?
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Small request STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/16/2004 07:24:33 AM ----- BODY:My sound card works now, and I bought some speakers yesterday, and I have a fast connection at work. I would appreciate music suggestions, when possible with a URL from which I could download interesting MP3s.
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: My sound card works now, and I bought some speakers yesterday, and I have a fast connection at work. I would appreciate music suggestions, when possible with a URL from which I could download interesting MP3s.... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: novala EMAIL: sodazitron@gmx.net IP: 194.232.66.11 URL: http://sodazitron.blogger.de DATE: 09/16/2004 11:31:50 AMI don't know what you like, but check out www.tonspion.de
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Scott Partee EMAIL: scotty@halfass.com IP: 208.61.32.79 URL: http://halfass.com DATE: 09/16/2004 23:39:13 PMCheck out:
http://www.huumerecordings.com/
Vladislov Delay is awesome stuff... So download all songs. I can't remember exactly how to find them, because the site is trying so hard to be arty that it never has any navigation links, just unrelated words you can click on. Dig around.
Also, there's a few MP3 blogs that link to every fre" MP3 they find out there... these are files that are made available by the artists or the labels. I'll dig up some links. But 3hive.com is good. Also, this metafilter post (http://www.metafilter.com/mefi/34264) has a roundup of a bunch I've never tried.
Also, I highly recommend you download iTunes. It's the best digital music software I've found, even on Windows, and I've tried them all. Additionally, iTunes has started giving away a free song each week!
If you don't mind paying, there's two good options:
1) http://www.emusic.com Tons of small labels with lots of great jazz, electronica and metal stuff, and some really weird recordings. Cost: $15 for 90 Songs (if I remember right...)
2) http://www.allofmp3.com Russian server for legal mp3 downloads (at least legal in Russia). Really big selection with "online encoding", where you can choose the quality of the download. Cheap, at $0.01 per megabyte downloaded. You'll find mainstreamy things there. I got all the seventies stuff from allofmp3 during my recent musical dementia.
I just got a fast connection myself--well, fast for this place--and I have had fun listening to some of the things here:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio3/newmusic/
http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio3/hearandnow/
http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio3/mixingit/
But I don't think you can download and keep the music -- just listen, unless you have some fancypants pirating software or something. (And if you do, let me know.)
I also like kd lang's version of Helpless available on the Guardian for free at the moment.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/arts/features/story/0,11710,1303740,00.html
i've just discovered another russian site: http://www.mp3search.ru/
.05 - .15 a song, $1.20 for complete albums. i'm in love :)
My absentee ballot arrived in the mail yesterday and boy is it complicated. I'll sit down eventually, with a pot of coffee, and try to figure the damn thing out, but I can imagine stuff like this is a real barrier for some people. The envelope is full of computer-card type cards, in various colors, with little holes to punch out. And what appear to be several instruction booklets. I just glanced at them last night and quickly shoved them back into the envelope, promising myself to study the material soon when I was less tired.
I'm not sure whether Washington State is a hotly-contested state in the upcoming presidential elections, or not. I have heard that Kerry has pretty good chances there. Just in case, though, I thought I'd announce that I will be taking offers to sell my vote(s) during the next week for the local and national elections.
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: My absentee ballot arrived in the mail yesterday and boy is it complicated. I'll sit down eventually, with a pot of coffee, and try to figure the damn thing out, but I can imagine stuff like this is a real... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: anne EMAIL: tuckova@gmail.com IP: 213.210.177.152 URL: http://www.tuckova.com DATE: 09/16/2004 11:53:16 AMi'll buy your vote off of you with a GMAIL ACCOUNT! how's that? given what our absentee ballots were worth last year, i think you may be getting the better deal if you take me up on it. act now. my operators are standing by.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/16/2004 11:57:51 AMdude, i still have 6 extra gmail accounts to give away myself, so you'll have to do better than that.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: eric EMAIL: eric@bo.gs IP: 217.12.15.64 URL: http://bo.gs DATE: 09/16/2004 12:55:44 PMi filled in my absentee ballot yesterday... the san francisco ballot wasn't complicated per se—just long.
most disappointing to me was no option to un-elect governor schwarzenegger...
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: gordon EMAIL: gordondf@hotmail.com IP: 66.28.105.35 URL: DATE: 09/16/2004 15:09:49 PMAccording to latimes.com's poll tracker (where you can amuse/horrify yourself with various electoral scenarios), in Washington it's currently Bush 45%, Kerry 47%, Nader 1%, 7% Undecided. Sounds like a swing state. Vote!
(In my state, Kerry leads by 14% - I haven't seen a presidential campaign ad yet! Of course, you probably haven't either.)
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/16/2004 17:35:06 PMYour state - insobriety?
Actually, the "Democrats Abroad" are quite active here, hitting up on people at showings of Fahrenheit 9/11 to register to vote, etc.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: gordon EMAIL: gordondf@hotmail.com IP: 66.28.105.35 URL: DATE: 09/16/2004 18:24:56 PMI don't know if John Kerry could get on the ballot in the state of Insobriety.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Paul EMAIL: rant@industrialfreedom.net IP: 24.18.129.193 URL: DATE: 09/16/2004 21:22:01 PMAh, being remotely located from Washington State you missed the whole brew-haha (wonder where that word came from?) about the state switching from open primaries to ones where you can only vote for one party per primary, hence the confusing and possibly multiple ballots (our county just had one ballot but with color coded areas and if you colored out side your color coded area you are toast.
Have fun.
P.S.
The primary election was two days ago, so you probably don't need to bother sending in the ballot.
"dude, i still have 6 extra gmail accounts to give away myself, so you'll have to do better than that."
ha! well, i was trying to say that your vote was worth about as much as a gmail account. when i first was able to vote i was so excited about it and The Possibilities of Democracy and all that, but then i saw absentee ballots tossed out with such speed last year, not to mention the blunt edge of the electoral college and the whole "every vote actually DOESN'T count equally" concept it drove home, and oh, it's all so bleak and sad. i'm voting, don't misunderstand me. but it's less exciting than it was. and having those extra gmail accounts is, to a much lesser degree of course, the same. i mean, i'm very happy to have MY gmail account thank you thank you eeksy, but almost everybody i know now has more gmail accounts than they know what to do with. so in a way they're "worthless". see the parallel? yes, yes, of course you do.
um. just don't forget to vote, that's all i have to say.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: D EMAIL: dave@acerbia.com IP: 81.157.15.25 URL: http://www.acerbia.com DATE: 09/20/2004 22:30:05 PMHe'll spend so long bartering for a decent trade that he'll forget to post it.
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Trapped STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/17/2004 08:56:13 AM ----- BODY:Did the Twilight Zone ever do an episode about a guy trapped in a children's book?
Wait, before I start: guys, go get your prostate checked. Fucking another Ramone just died, of prostate cancer this time. I went a while ago and the doctor did it via ultrasound, no invasion at all. It was almost... I hate to use the word "anticlimactic" but nothing better occurs to me. Anyway. Seriously.
Now, the guy trapped in a children's book: he comes home and the helianthus patch is growing ten feet high in front of his living room windows, in full bloom and glowing golden in the setting sun. A happy little girl with glittery trinkets in her tangled hair runs out to greet him, dancing in her pyjamas. He forgets his sore back and the story he had wanted to tell about having to unload a vanload of luggage at the airport and how fucked up he is from the pain pills. Instead he eats his food until he's called out into the dark to watch the antics of a new hedgehog, Little Black Face, son (?) of Black Face. No, wait, LBF is in the left house, this one's even smaller and in the far right house. Look, he's tipped over his food dish. Look, he's climbed underneath. He's totally manipulating the food dish. It must be the Little Guy. LG is playing with his dish. The man goes back into the house and finishes his food. Cats are snoozing on the kids' beds. He snuggles with the smaller kid and tells her a story but falls asleep in the middle of it and wakes up and moves to his own bed. In the morning it is reported to him that LG has taken up residence in the far right house, to which the man added extra straw the previous day as LG had been tearing up the newspaper and moving straw and leaves inside for a nest. LG has figured out how to use his food dish as a door, rolling it in front of the entrance to keep others out. LG is the Einstein of hedgehogs.
The man feeds the cats. He looks like he is wearing furry boots, but it's just cat hair on his suit. He goes outside and calls the tortoise. It responds, climbs out of its new house (deeper, tapered for a greater sense of security, better insulated) and comes over to eat some lettuce and protein pellets.
Tom Waites probably has pets too, the man tells himself.
tom waits surely has a pet (rain) dog. and a swordfish, possibly. i'm not sure about hedgehogs.
he has two kids, though*, so there's probably something furry around.
*i think it's two.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: anne EMAIL: tuckova@gmail.com IP: 213.210.177.152 URL: http://www.tuckova.com DATE: 09/17/2004 09:26:10 AMthree children.
also, i forgot to include a mule on the potential pet list.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Noneya EMAIL: threepeasinapod@email.com IP: 216.68.181.114 URL: http://threepeasinapod.blogspot.com DATE: 09/17/2004 18:49:43 PMI love the hedgehog stories! Keep 'em coming.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: j-a EMAIL: jeonga_kim@yahoo.co.uk IP: 202.71.195.230 URL: http://www.whatarewedoinghere.blogspot.com DATE: 09/19/2004 07:46:54 AMyour house is turning into a menagerie...
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: ArtichokeHeart EMAIL: artichokeheart@mac.com IP: 12.218.197.77 URL: http://lovesinsects.blogspot.com DATE: 09/22/2004 13:36:51 PMIt sounds pretty delightful, actually. I have plenty of cats, but long for a tortoise and some hedgehogs.
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Briefly STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/20/2004 11:32:21 AM ----- BODY:Although Monday, today turned out to be a windfall day off for me, so I won't be online much. One of the cats injured his left foreleg and has been spending the weekend in the office, and it smells like it, so I'll be outside in the fresh air today, shopping for new kitty litter boxes and hedgehog food, working out, taking a cello lesson, driving kids here and there, going to my shrink, in general doing all those things one does on a windfall day off.
To demonstrate what a nice pre-autumn day it is here today, here are a few pictures of the flowers growing in front of my house. They are ten feet tall.
in what language do you pull up the couch, so to speak?
the pictures are lovely.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: j-a EMAIL: jeonga_kim@yahoo.co.uk IP: 202.71.195.230 URL: http://www.whatarewedoinghere.blogspot.com DATE: 09/21/2004 08:49:58 AMthose are some really beautiful flowers. the blueness of your sky is fantastic. wish i could see autumn (hong kong having nothing but tropical weather still - it is 26 degrees celsius at NIGHT).
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: chris EMAIL: chris@nospam.com IP: 216.62.108.26 URL: http://www.javablack.com DATE: 09/21/2004 12:16:00 PMEr- I think it's time to mow the lawn, mig.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jessica EMAIL: jessica@peacedividend.com IP: 66.117.128.123 URL: http://www.peacedividend.com DATE: 09/21/2004 17:31:49 PMIt's still summer here, but we had winter for a few hours on Sunday:
Our flowers are only 8' tall.
The sky really is that blue. I was going to make the colors more intense in photoshop, but there was no need.
Chris: hah. And my bushes need to be trimmed. And my fruit trees should be pruned, but I want to find someone who knows what they are doing to do it right for me this fall.
Jessica: yes, no html. Links are automatically inserted if you type in the raw url. I used to think it would discourage comment spam... it does help a bit against links in the body of the comment, but doesn't seem to slow them down much. Beautiful flowers, you showoff.
I've always felt short. If I'm talking to a tall person, I feel short. If I'm talking to someone shorter than I am, I feel about as tall as they are. Generally speaking. Personality matters too -- if they have a large personality, I also feel shorter than them, no matter how tall they are.
According to my American driver's license, long expired, I am 5'11" tall, but I always thought that was fudged upwards a bit -- when I originally got that license I was about 5' 10", I think, but figured I'd still grow some so added the extra inch.
A few weeks ago, I was at the American Embassy here to renew my daughter's American passport. The form she filled out asked how tall she was. She asked the clerk for a calculator so we could do the conversion, and the clerk pointed out a thing on the wall? What would you call it, a strip of paper six inches wide with feet and inches marked off. My daughter stood up to it and we knew how tall she was.
For fun I stood up to it and it said I was 6'1" tall. Minus an inch for my shoes (which are not really that high) and I would be at least 6' tall.
In an instant, I went from feeling short to feeling, if not tall, at least taller. It was what could be called in German an Aha-Erlebnis. Which could be translated as an epiphany, although I would not be completely happy with that translation. Literally it would translate as "aha-experience". Something that makes you say, "aha."
I may have even said, "aha!" Or I may have said, "hey, I'm tall."
Since then, I've been living in a different world. I had always envied people who were six feet tall, and now I am one of them! All thanks to that paper thing on the wall of the American Embassy!
I'm sure it was accurate: surely, the Embassy does not want people putting inaccurate information on their passports. So there is absolutely no need to ever again measure myself. I'm six feet tall. At least. Even taller in the mornings when my hair is standing straight up.
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: I've always felt short. If I'm talking to a tall person, I feel short. If I'm talking to someone shorter than I am, I feel about as tall as they are. Generally speaking. Personality matters too -- if they have... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: ratty [5' 4.5" and NEVER getting any shorter] EMAIL: ratty@surreally.net IP: 4.26.76.16 URL: http://ratty.surreally.net DATE: 09/22/2004 07:31:37 AMand you are SO much more sexy now.
now that you're tall.
woohoo!
in my [short] case, i'm afraid that the 4 inches i need, to be my ideal height, will always elude me ... [sigh]
i've always been considered quite tall given my age, gender and occupation (late 20s, woman, office geek).
being tall is a GOOD THING.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/22/2004 07:46:09 AMYeah, 6 feet is a sexy height, isn't it. Although somehow 5'11" sounds taller to me. Or at least, I had myself convinced it did until I grew.
I don't know, j-a. I guess you're right, being tall has certain advantages. It never makes any difference for me, though, in how I perceive other people. I've always been more interested in aspects of their personalities, such as, you know, Are they intelligent? Do they have a sense of humor? Are they interested in having sex with me? Are they buying me drinks?
I'm twenty-two feet tall. But I'm a poplar, so I still feel a bit on the shortish side. And my leaves quiver.
Six feet? How could you knot (poplar spelling variant) know? I forget how tall I am in centimeters, but it's on a card. Wait...
I'm listed as 170 centimeters, which is, now that I do the conversion, 5'7". I think I'm nearer 5'8", which is still not very tall, but I don't want to round up and lie about it, and I would feel stupid saying "I'm five feet seven and a half inches," like a kid saying "I'm five years old, going on six." So I probably told the woman at the passport office 5'7". But maybe it's grounds for deportation. They used to calculate our water bill by how many people lived in the apartment. Maybe height also counts? I washed an extra couple of centimeters every day, completely off the books, for years.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: deb EMAIL: sugarfused@gmail.com IP: 24.158.178.235 URL: http://www.sugarfused.com/ DATE: 09/22/2004 11:15:08 AMHmmm...maybe there's hope for my bathroom scale yet!
Honestly, I always add a half inch to my height whenever asked. I figure if I hold my shoulders up and keep my back straight like my mother tried to teach me to do oh so many years ago, I can stretch into it :)
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: ArtichokeHeart EMAIL: artichokeheart@mac.com IP: 12.218.197.77 URL: http://lovesinsects.blogspot.com DATE: 09/22/2004 13:39:09 PMI have always had aspirations for tallness. As of yet, however, they remain sadly unfulfilled.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: joeri EMAIL: joeri.cornille@pandora.be IP: 193.244.32.131 URL: http://www.urendagennachten.be/blogger.html DATE: 09/22/2004 13:43:17 PMso what is 190 cm in feet/inches?
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Brian EMAIL: bmkane@gmail.com IP: 207.190.233.48 URL: http://www.briankaneonline.com DATE: 09/22/2004 14:38:55 PMAnd you're skinny, too, aren't you?
Grrrrrr.... from all us tubby little gnome-people.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Sarah EMAIL: sjersild@hotmail.com IP: 24.13.100.4 URL: http://www.fiendishplot.com DATE: 09/22/2004 16:14:52 PMOne of the best things about living in Hong Kong was that I was finally tall -- I could see over people on elevators and on the train. It was glorious. Then I moved back to the US, and my 5'5" was distinctly average again. Sigh.
I was talking to a (genuinely tall, maybe 6 foot or more) friend yesterday, and we decided I was spiritually tall. By the puny measuring implements of so-called "science" I'm of average height, but in spirit and attitude, I'm at least 6 feet tall. And I look like Greta garbo (withouthe being dead part)
Oops, time to take my meds.....
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jessica EMAIL: jessica@peacedividend.com IP: 66.117.128.123 URL: http://www.peacedividend.com DATE: 09/22/2004 16:56:54 PMI remember the day I measured myself against that wooden version of the paper thing at a friend's medical practice and discovered I was 5' 2 3/4". Such pride. But every time I go to the doctor's and they use that Metal Arm Thingie that's attached to the Scale of Evil it says 5'2".
Always a fan of contrasts, my bedpost notches refer mostly to men of 6'4" stature. With big deathrock hair. And nasty drug habits. The 80s was a fun time to be a teenager, I tell you what. Sigh.
Anyway. I always knew you were 6'1".
And the silver-y highlights in your hair? They add an inch all on their own.
So how tall is La Beta? I'm guessing 5'3", 5'4"? And rising.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/22/2004 17:54:59 PMIt depends whether she's hitting me or not, Jessica.
Silver-y highlights? I like that. When my sister was here, she said to my wife something along the lines of, "jesus, his hair's white!" which I guess is a little sister's job.
Joeri: I suppose about 5'7" or 5'8"...
Brian: not skinny yet. BUT I HAVE LOST 5 KILOGRAMS NOW!!! although I haven't weighed myself since I ate a whole bag of pistachios last night... See, I'm giving myself a total makeover.
yeah right. 6'2 is more like it dude
length does matter, you know :)
Sorry, my mistake...
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: flerdle EMAIL: flerdle@flerdle.net IP: 82.178.81.49 URL: DATE: 09/24/2004 09:35:09 AMBeing short is not fun.
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Tip for guys # whatever STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/23/2004 07:43:51 AM ----- BODY:If you're riding the public transportation in Vienna and it's crowded and you're standing next to a pretty 15-year old dark-haired girl, you might somehow think it's a good idea to stealthily put your arm around her, but it's not. In fact, it's a sure way to get a very sharp elbow in the ribs.
----- EXTENDED BODY:Because that girl is my daughter Beta, you see. Somewhere in Vienna this morning, a man with strong B.O. is rubbing his ribcage, replaying the events of yesterday afternoon and wondering what went wrong. Or maybe he's being more polite to women.
I'm awfully proud of her, but I do hope she doesn't get her ass kicked some day. I'm trying to talk her into taking the dirtiest dirty-fighting class we can find, just in case.
----- EXCERPT: If you're riding the public transportation in Vienna and it's crowded and you're standing next to a pretty 15-year old dark-haired girl, you might somehow think it's a good idea to stealthily put your arm around her, but it's not.... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Karan EMAIL: karan@flummel.com IP: 24.18.52.52 URL: http://www.flummel.com/ee DATE: 09/23/2004 15:48:29 PMYay Beta!!!
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephanie EMAIL: stephanie.hendrick@engelska.umu.se IP: 81.172.179.119 URL: http://www.sumofmyparts.com/blog DATE: 09/23/2004 19:32:32 PMYou go, Beta! Strong women always come out on top!
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: novala EMAIL: sodazitron@gmx.net IP: 194.232.66.11 URL: http://sodazitron.blogger.de DATE: 09/24/2004 08:13:13 AMbut it's pretty lonely up there
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Drakona EMAIL: svesk@hotmail.com IP: 130.241.42.152 URL: DATE: 09/24/2004 09:12:29 AMBut the view is amazing.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: novala EMAIL: sodazitron@gmx.net IP: 194.232.66.11 URL: http://sodazitron.blogger.de DATE: 09/24/2004 12:03:54 PMTo meet other people you have to get down again though ;-)
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: wildsoda EMAIL: ali@wildsoda.com IP: 69.86.100.105 URL: http://www.wildsoda.com DATE: 09/26/2004 01:33:42 AMI don't know about anyone else here, novala, but being groped by strangers on the subway really isn't my idea of a great way to meet someone. Are you suggesting that women who defend themselves from men who assault them are somehow deficient in social skills when it comes to dating (other) men?
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: novala EMAIL: sodazitron@gmx.net IP: 80.108.27.99 URL: http://sodazitron.blogger.de DATE: 09/26/2004 11:02:11 AMThe opposite, wildsoda, the opposite.
I am saying that in the society I live in a lot of men are somehow deficient in social skills when it comes to dating strong women. A lot of them are very attracted by strong women and scared of them at the same time. In what I was saying above I was playing with Stephanie's and Drakona's entries, not with Beta being able to defend herself.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jessica EMAIL: jessica@peacedividend.com IP: 66.117.128.123 URL: http://www.peacedividend.com DATE: 09/27/2004 18:24:29 PMThey're that way in the Mission, too, but I'm not going to smile when they grab my ass just to make them feel better. Let them be afraid. Or let them taste pepper spray. Feh.
There are some awfully cute pepper spray decanters available, now, Mig. And fighting classes are usually pretty fun.
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Guest post: Mig's turtle (#2) STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/27/2004 08:55:41 AM ----- BODY:
As I've mentioned before, fools, it's tortoise, not turtle. Testudo hermanni. Protected species: I practically have a license to kill.
Important difference: turtles are aquatic, tortoises are not. I wish someone would tell that to Mig's loopy father-in-law, who give me "swimming lessons". Christ, I shit myself with fear every time that guy comes near. And when he actually dips me in a bucket full of water - my heart's beating so fast I sound like an electric razor. We sink like stones, dude, that's why we have a fear of water. Jesus.
The thing I hate about living in Austria is it's so fricking cold. Here we are, mid-September, too early to hibernate, and I'm already shivering my little ass off out in my cage at night. So okay, they put me inside, but what are my options - running laps like a neurotic wolf in this little tub-like contraption with some bark and leaves sprinkled on the bottom of it, trying to escape by climbing the walls until I get stuck in a corner at a 45-degree angle or reach vertical and fall over onto my back and sit there with my tail exposed, counting the spiderwebs on the ceiling until some idiot finally notices me, or running laps around the baseboards in the fricking kitchen.
I try to will my metabolism slower, I really do. But there's no fighting millions and millions of years of evolution. Things happen when they're meant to happen and not before. Have to wait for the digestive tract to empty itself out, for one thing. And how's that supposed to happen when I'm still hungry and they keep feeding me? Lettuce this morning, little pile of it in the middle of the kitchen, with some protein pellets, the small kind, sprinkled on top.
Protein pellets, you know this, right? Protein pellets are a bit sticky when they're damp. Softer, easier to chew, but they stick to your fucking head. Put yourself in my position, hungry, all you've got to eat is this pile of bland lettuce and the last delicious protein pellet is stuck there in the middle of your forehead driving you cross-eyed. It's like having a full bank account and you can't remember your PIN code to withdraw the money - it's a bit comforting to know it's there, even if it's not doing you any good, and no one else can get it, especially if you withdraw your head into your shell.
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: As I've mentioned before, fools, it's tortoise, not turtle. Testudo hermanni. Protected species: I practically have a license to kill. Important difference: turtles are aquatic, tortoises are not. I wish someone would tell that to Mig's loopy father-in-law, who... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: j-a EMAIL: jeonga_kim@yahoo.co.uk IP: 202.71.195.230 URL: http://www.whatarewedoinghere.blogspot.com DATE: 09/28/2004 07:52:26 AMdear dear. let's hope you don't drown the next time someone mistakes you for a turtle.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: cj EMAIL: cjcbanane@aol.com IP: 64.12.116.76 URL: http://journals.aol.com/cjcbanane/Test/ DATE: 09/30/2004 04:43:17 AMYay. I love the tortoise posts. It's important to see the reptilian view of the world.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Gordon EMAIL: gordondf@hotmail.com IP: 66.28.105.35 URL: DATE: 10/01/2004 17:15:12 PMDoes your tortoise hangs out at the countrt of this crumbly old diner near my apartment? I think I've seen him there with a couple other old-timers, grumbling about the government, protein pellets stuck to their heads.
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: How to attract people STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/28/2004 08:26:23 AM ----- BODY:Provisional results of the ongoing Metamorphosism research project on how to attract people, executive summary:
Subject M, 45-year old male
Hmm... maybe that's my problem? I've been farting in other people's offices instead of my own.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: eeksypeeksy EMAIL: eeksypeeksy@gmail.com IP: 83.25.129.167 URL: http://eeksypeeksy.blogspot.com DATE: 09/28/2004 12:07:01 PMWhat's a chakra again?
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: cj EMAIL: cjcbanane@aol.com IP: 64.12.116.76 URL: http://journals.aol.com/cjcbanane/Test/ DATE: 09/30/2004 04:47:52 AMSo - farting attracts psycho beautiful women who feel the need to marry men who they regularly have to lock out? Niiiiice.
Fart on.
Does diet modification change the kinds of women who come along?
More research is needed.
jesus, totally forgot to record what i'd been eating... lots of "sugar-free" chewing gum...
i'll repeat the experiment next time my wife cooks lentil soup. or my mother-in-law cooks anything.
If Iraq descends into a civil war, will Bush get to count it as one of his?
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: If Iraq descends into a civil war, will Bush get to count it as one of his?... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Big Time Patriot EMAIL: rant@bigtimepatriot.com IP: 24.19.23.173 URL: http://www.bigtimepatriot.com DATE: 09/29/2004 22:10:00 PMI think Bush gets blame for the Iraqi Civil war as well as the coming Afghanistan Civil war as well. Perhaps even the upcoming Florida Voters Civil War..(but that might get blamed on his brother Jeb).
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: nicematt EMAIL: nicematt@hotmail.com IP: 69.133.141.71 URL: DATE: 10/24/2004 15:13:30 PMI love how the Bush administration can accuse Kerry of using the politics of fear, then turn around and casually mention the possibility of terrorists detonating a nuclear bomb in a major US city. The two statements are uncritically repeated without any context by reporters. Where is the fucking media in this country?
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Unpacking the pens STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/29/2004 07:40:55 AM ----- BODY:Just when certain positive life changes conspire to make one feel less Bug-like, threatening the very existence of a certain on-line "comic strip", school starts again, and with it long drives into the city with a teenager.
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: Just when certain positive life changes conspire to make one feel less Bug-like, threatening the very existence of a certain on-line "comic strip", school starts again, and with it long drives into the city with a teenager.... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Brian EMAIL: bmkane@gmail.com IP: 207.190.233.48 URL: http://www.briankaneonline.com DATE: 09/29/2004 17:29:42 PM::emits small cry of glee::
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: j-a EMAIL: jeonga_kim@yahoo.co.uk IP: 202.71.195.230 URL: http://www.whatarewedoinghere.blogspot.com DATE: 09/30/2004 06:03:02 AMwe're waiting....!
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/30/2004 06:42:29 AMokay, pens unpacked. opening sketch pad now.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Paul EMAIL: rant@industrialfreedom.net IP: 24.19.23.173 URL: DATE: 09/30/2004 20:17:31 PMall talk and no cartoons.. c'mon, lets see 'em!
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: I'm married to Jennifer Aniston! STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/30/2004 09:51:49 AM ----- BODY:Briefly I considered writing a serious post about being hypnotized but the sort of corny humor inherent in hypnosis just makes it impossible. Also, the story gets a little personal and nobody here wants to hear personal stories, right.
Nevertheless, I was hypnotized last night, or something very much like it.
I watched "K-Pax" a couple weeks ago, and there is a scene where Jeff Bridges hypnotizes Kevin Spacey by counting him down from five, and brings him back by counting him back up. I watched that scene and was all like, Oh sure, no watch?
Well, last night this person who hypnotized me didn't even count me down from five. He didn't even tell me I was being hypnotized, for that matter, which makes me wonder whether I was actually hypnotized or something else, hence the disclaimer in the second half of the first paragraph up there.
OTOH, he did count me back up from 5 to 1, which made me think, "Holy shit, I've been hypnotized!!!" (Verbatim quote, BTW, from around "4").
Don't ask me what went on in between, because I haven't the faintest idea. I may have been doing naked George Burns impressions for the staff for all I know, although I did not smell of cigar smoke. Also, there was no staff. Anyway, another Kevin Spacey moment in my life.
It was really amazing; at least, I was really amazed. I still am.
Have you ever been hypnotized?
----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: Briefly I considered writing a serious post about being hypnotized but the sort of corny humor inherent in hypnosis just makes it impossible. Also, the story gets a little personal and nobody here wants to hear personal stories, right. Nevertheless,... ----- KEYWORDS: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: eeksypeeksy EMAIL: eeksypeeksy@gmail.com IP: 83.25.142.237 URL: http://eeksypeeksy.blogspot.com DATE: 09/30/2004 11:16:12 AMI haven't been hypnotized, but I have recently (and at other times) thought about it. You know, thinking about how I wish a hypnotist would convince me to X, whatever X was. That sort of hypnosis. And X could be anything, like, suddenly have the willpower of Napoleon or suddenly be as at home on stage as some movie star or whatever. But I don't believe in it. Hypnosis might make you lose self-awareness for awhile, but I don't believe it can make long-term changes. All those self-improvement titles you see in the book store would be gone. There would be a hypnotist on every block. Hypnosis would be a popular major at college. All corporations would hire hypnotists. Teachers would learn hypnotism.
So I'm pretty sure what it doesn't do. But what _does_ it do? You have no idea at all what you did while you were under?
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: francis s. EMAIL: francis.strand@gmail.com IP: 193.15.61.253 URL: http://www.francisstrand.blogspot.com DATE: 09/30/2004 13:31:20 PMI've never been hypnotized, either, but I have often wondered what it would be like, and while I'm almost as skeptical as Eeksy, a friend of mine who smoked for 35 years found that hypnotism was the only thing that worked to get her to stop.
But, what exactly happens, that's what I want to know.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Brian EMAIL: bmkane@gmail.com IP: 207.190.233.48 URL: http://www.briankaneonline.com DATE: 09/30/2004 14:01:51 PMA few years ago, the therapist I was seeing at the time did a couple of hypnosis-like sessions with me, but it was quite a bit different than the party-trick variety. It was not at all like I expected. I remember the entire experience and never felt like I was "out".
Of course, every time someone says the word "elevator" now, I cluck like a chicken and peck the ground.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: mig EMAIL: mig@metamorphosism.com IP: 80.122.106.26 URL: DATE: 09/30/2004 14:31:38 PMThat's the odd thing. I do remember what went on during the session, but not all of it. There are two blank spaces, blanker than sleep, which makes me wonder, like, what part of my brain is blocking that. Or, how does the brain work, exactly. Or something.
----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: peggy EMAIL: moveable@moveablebeast.com IP: 204.116.189.3 URL: http://www.moveablebeast.com DATE: 09/30/2004 18:23:06 PMYes, I was hypnotized once. In front of my entire high school student body (and bodies). I was given a post-hypnotic suggestion, too. And yes, I did stand up and shout something stupid. In front of my whole student bodies. I carry the scars to this day.
----- -------- AUTHOR: Mig TITLE: Don't ask him what he earns STATUS: Publish ALLOW COMMENTS: 2 CONVERT BREAKS: __default__ PRIMARY CATEGORY: CATEGORY: DATE: 09/30/2004 13:21:04 PM ----- BODY:So my daughter Beta attends a school so cool that they got a famous Austrian artist to come give a talk to the kids. Hermann Nitsch, I'd love to see him in action once. I would go to great lengths to hear him speak. Not as far, say, as leaving work early and going to my kid's school, but you know. Who wouldn't want to see someone throw a couple buckets of blood around?
Beta's really enthused, too.